haiya.......i am in a mess right now? can someone teach me what to do now? today i received three calls from the same company who is my customer. First of all, the secretary of the General Manager, then came the General Manager who call me personally........shall i reject or not. anyway its just only the final interview and to choose between 1 ppl out of 3 wat......what's there to be afraid.... but a little bit of stress.......you know pre-mxxxxxx stress........don want how to manage, nobody to help me, shall i go or shall i not go......crazy crazy crazy, to do or not to do......
after reading the forum from the website of S'pore B, a little bit of scared sia..... shall i consider or not consider? or just go ahead or maybe that is the only who is different from others, a lao shi one leh.......haiya.......one bitten, very scared. must be prepared......shall i go for the pre-w course or not. i think i need a pychologist to advise me......think too much....... in this world, there are different kind of species around, bad, good, poisonous, non-poisonous, cold-blooded, hot-blooded, ugly, pretty.......you just cant differentiate you know yeh....its not written on the forehead. i have gone thru a good experience, its up to me to trust or not to trust. now i onli trust myself....... man's heart cant see thru naked eyes.....believe me, you will regret. here a good example sitting down here, who got cursed.......and almost lost the life.......believe me.....only trust yourself and god who live within us.......no more....... sometimes its not your feeling that makes you decide but its some unseen forces that is creating chaos..... these are some strange things which science is unable to explain, but do believe in miracle...they do come by......
it's me PEGGY again at [9:00 AM]
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back again! yday came back very late in Singapore. heard these few days raining season in sin ah? back to work today....tot that will be very busy 2day, but then..... so free at work, no shipment today, just clear the backlog only.....my good disciple has done a great job when i not around.....everything is in order......not so stress liao....
went shopping like hell these few days, bought 4 pairs of shoes, damn cheap and they are having sales....i bought the shoes all less than one hundred buck....
today called my sister and we talked quite long, then msn stella talk abt the divorce matter.....after that....after work, call her again....chat lah....then went to bedok interchange and have one big hole in my pocket....no choice....these few months....really have to spend a lot of money,.....i save like crazy....but still unable to keep the $$$......... still got somemore to come....at least one problem solve liao....still got somemore to come....don want to think.......next monday and wednesday, is vegetarian day for me.....only tuesday, i can eat meat.....and also going for appt after work over at jurong side...... very busy sia........don know what to say..... good luck to me.....
GOD IS GREAT!!! May god bless me with good health, good wealth, good family and everything that is good....... may god stay by my side to continue to protect me from devil, evil and satan!!! May god give us the moral support in everything we do....amen.
it's me PEGGY again at [1:30 PM]
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times seems to be very slow....another one more day of work, i will go and relax...... will be back in the office on thursday.....to clear the mess.... and then another busy week ahead, the first week and second week of july will be on leave again.....a lot of things to do....today just went to weigh my weight, my gosh, drop to 47kgs. I remember that was a period of times that i put on weight - 50kgs but that was before i went back to tampines. don know why, just do not have any appetite to eat and i don seem to enjoy food anymore, esp chicken.....why? no idea.
yday, eric called me and told me that he will be going to K song, then just now kelvin called me and told me that today he just went to k song with his friends and so envious becos long time never k song liao. then he mentioned that he found a cheong kaki who like techno and was talking abt the ex - mu at int'l bldg. those were the days i cheong like seow....but i told him, don don ever try to xia me go cheong, becos i already closed the doors to the public......don know why, maybe when you get older, these things are not important to me or maybe after the illness, a lot of things change and my opinions on life changed too.....just glad that i am still alive and god who is always by my side to protect me. I just to be a simple little girl.
today went for a job interview, don really like it, maybe just stick to the old one first till next year, becos i don think that they will accept the fact where i have to keep taking leaves...but i have no choice leh..so i decided to stick on first....even though i dislike coming into the FTZ. i feel so uncomfortable and disappointed whenever i stepped into this place.....bad memories, i just don like the feelings....i was thinking if i got the chance to get away, i won't mind going to work in Mac donalds....he...he..crazy, you thought school holiday job meh....
Was introduced to the singaporebrides forum by stella, in fact i thought what kind of website is that....you see she wanted to divorce the husband but in the same time she also wanted to wear wedding gown, but the man really hurt her too much. i went into the site and my gosh, there is a lot of topics to talk to. In a case, whereby a girl broke up with her bf after her abortion....that idiot, really a bastard. another case, a girl divorced one year but the husband refused to sell the flat, but illegally rented the whole unit and took the rental without giving half of the money to her. one more case abt a girl whose husband have an affair and was caught red handed by her when she went cheonging after her confinemants.....After reading so many articles, i was a little bit of disappointed with the world, a little bit of scared. Sometimes, it takes two hands to clap and for a marriage, it takes two parties to commit......can you imagine the divorce has been so common and has been increasing over the years........after reading the articles, feel a little bit guilty though, years ago, i used to be a third party and up todate, don really want a third party to come into my relationship. I keep asking myself why why why? What shall i do and how shall i do......Going into relationship is easy but to maintain is a difficult task, even if i try my very best, sometimes fault doesn't lie with me.
Really have phobia....but this is part of life...no matter wat still have to go thru....Oh god! please guide me to the correct path, and bless me with good wealth, good health, good family, good marriage and everything that you think is good for me.
it's me PEGGY again at [2:00 PM]
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haiya, very tired leh.....yday at least can slp well but still tired leh. maybe becos of the sweet hug...yday what did i do? oh.....i went to toa payoh OCBC bank after work becos i got an appt with the officer there to sign an important document with that ox. haiya....i rush like hell, i left office at 5pm then take bus from changi village to toa payoh, took me 1 hour... buttock pain.
after that, faster reach home lor, then my brother come back. my granny called and ask my mum where he go then suddenly he appear at my door step. so funny, now my granny become his mother liao....
today, nothing special lah, the weather cold leh and since the day i recovered from my illness, i already got no mood to work till now lor..... maybe my mind open up and wake up liao lor....last time before i was cured, i never open my eyes clearly and don know who is good or bad. everybody looks the same.... trust myself and god better. still as usual, every night before sleep will say a night prayer to god. tomorrow will be a brighter day. tomorrow should be going to circuit road to enjoy a vegetarian feast, becos tomorrow 15th, hee...hee.... no meat for me tomorrow.
i went to tampines interchange and all these jewellery shops all put 50% worldwide sale, but don get tricked, not all ok. all their wedding bands hah, only 10% to 20%, you wait long long they can give you up to 50% ok.
suddenly think of ming yang, a handsome man twenty years ago, but i think he is still handsome now, wanted to hear him sing again leh....then when i went home, i just try my luck to search for the song "fen shou bai zai xiong kou" (break up just put by the heart)then bingo, have,but cant download, so i just listen, i so happy can hear it again, i tell that ox but he just sit down there read the magazine so i also don bother, becos i fucking happy liao. then i found another song "qi shi wo yi wu shuo you" (actually i have nothing), so i also happily listen, then suddenly this ox reading the magazine behind me hah, also sing this song, i was stunt, oh my god, he knew how to sing leh.....surprise leh....then we two jump like mad ppl. i suddenly feel very funny deep in my heart leh, ming yang is back in my heart.....very gan dong.....aiyo. this kind of feelings haha, just like how i feel ten over years ago.....
i wish that time can fly fast fast, doraemon pls come and help me turn fast fast the time, i don want to stay at that international woman association anymore, i can only change job next year, cant quit now, becos i got very important tasks. i got a job offer also have to reject becos i will be taking a lot of leaves these few months, so paiseh lor....no good opportunities liao can only wait lor....
it's me PEGGY again at [2:55 PM]
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pain pain pain
today is the first day........very pain....yday didnt slp well just becos of the cries of the two girls....wake me up........so sickening......i want to report police liao...... i am trying so hard to slp, in the end still wake up..... don know where they from.....sickening
this nike is worst, before 7.30am, make the stupid sound again........nobody like him liao except the two men in the house.....my dad and brother lah....oh forget still got one ox also like to dote on him.....
if you ever done a thing the first time, the second time, you should have confidence and but don know why leh...anyway no matter what, what ever you do must try to control your temper and give and take....this is a good lesson for me becos i am still regaining my health and try to do as many good deeds as you can in life, this will helps on your 因果。
let me share this with you: - the secret of 百忍成金.
什么事情看不通， 做成样子气冲冲。
无端白事心火动， 是否想做化骨龙。
有事不妨慢慢讲， 何须怒气在心中。
事情总是有解决， 不要弄到面红红。
苦果嬲坏條中氣﹐ 賺得走去買鹿茸。
君子不吃眼前虧﹐ 要把身體來保重。
記住百忍便成金﹐ 做人無須太衝動。
凡事應以和為貴﹐ 感情大可以交通。
四海之內皆兄弟﹐ 無謂冰炭不相容。
愛字能解萬種仇﹐ 莫把仇根來深種。
大事若能化小事﹐ 小事很快就無蹤。
只要一人讓一步﹐ 大家心裡樂融融。
表現自己的大量﹐ 才是真正有威風。
能有修養謂之勇﹐ 處世溫柔最有用。
顧全大家的體面﹐ 日後定有好相逢。
平心靜氣想一想﹐ 安靜令人百事通。
水落自然見石出﹐ 閒氣爭來過眼空。
試問誰人沒有錯﹐ 可容人處且相容
諒解對方的過失﹐ 贏得對方審感動。
山水也有相連日﹐ 人生何處不相逢。
Thats all for today lesson....will share with you again.
it's me PEGGY again at [2:00 PM]
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till the end of time still busy sia
back again........ very busy leh......this time round really very very busy, my asthmas attack has been very frequent and is a daily attack somemore.....due to stress lor. i so scare to go to sleep every night becos after night prayers, i am very awake and cannot sleep leh......my asthmas attack also happen at night....i cant even smoke....now reduce to one to two stick a day.....the worst is i cant even walk too much, becos i got no breath......
will be taking a lot of leave from now till end of the year, a lot of things to settle...somemore i just recovering from the illness leh......my body still got a lot of holes, still in the mid of healing so i must be very careful....be careful of evils, devils and satan........don worry, god will be by my side to protect me.
this month, a lot of arguments, i said, its the ox problem....this month is not an average month for him, he must not any how talk or else got misunderstanding.........
yday, when i was @ IMM, my mother called me becos my brother so careless..... got cut by the glass and then have to go tan tock seng to stitch ten stiches.....
another 10 days, wont be in SIN, i need to go away for a big breathe of the natural air.......very stress.......after i come back 4 days, later, appt again......then another week, another appt, then next month, don know how many appt....wow lao......very stress...... august, sept, oct, nov and dec, i really very busy.........can i don bother so much and let my mummy and that ox handle,,,,,, i so tired.....i don want to be the planner liao.....haiz.....god, please bless me with good health, good wealth, good luck and all those good stuff........and give me your best wishes.............
it's me PEGGY again at [2:01 PM]
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